Monday, January 07, 2008

Don't Look, Granny!

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I watched "Eastern Promises" last night. It stars Viggo Mortensen as a notorious London gangster. Turns out, he is actually a mole for Scotland Yard or Interpol. Who he actually works for is unclear, but I was so addled by the time we learned about that, I can't be relied upon to remember for sure.

The movie wasn't filmed in the dark, like so many others these days, but it was dreary-looking. It was rainy old London, after all. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE rainy old London. But, if the days had been all cheerful and sunshiny, Viggo and the other bad guys couldn't have gone around in those black trench coats, looking grim and menacing.

I gotta tell ya, girls, I just don't see what you-all obviously see in Viggo. And, I got to see a LOT of Viggo (and his shortcomings) in this film. When I saw that scene in the steam room, where Viggo had to fight off those two thugs, well, I had to cover my eyes (and, peek through my fingers). Because, ladies, he was NEKKID AS A JAYBIRD! Oh, my stars! I did manage to notice that he protected his tallywhacker a lot in that scene. Must have been what you might call a "conditioned response". Heheheh.

Otherwise, the movie is bloody and violent, with sex and language, not to mention subtitles. Not a feel-good movie, by any means. So, be careful about renting it, Granny, if you have a bad heart.

18 comments:

Jay said...

That movie was ... well ... different. It was good though.

DocMtCat said...

From that review something tells me I am not going to be running out and renting this movie any time soon.

(Is't tallywhacker one of the funniest words EVER?) ;-)


-Doc

Karen said...

Hysterical! Though I think I will be moving this film out of my Netflix que after your review...

PJ said...

Thanks for the warning. I'll stick to "Little Women", "Pride and Prejudice" and...oh yes, they're doing a new "Raisin in the Sun" which is my very favorite play to read!! And I like the OLD black and white version of it muchissimo!! So I'll pass on -- What's his face and "Eastern Promises" and wait for "Raisin in the Sun"

DirkStar said...

Is tallywhacker a noun or a verb?

I'm confused...

Peggy said...

I can't believe that you went and watched a movie with barenaked men in it! It does always rain over here, they were portraying grim reality!

Annie said...

Could I say that you have catholic (small c) tastes in your films?

Nancy said...

Hi Betty, 1:04 P.M. 1/8

I was so upset about the damned tornado that I put a warning to you on the wrong comment page.

Just to show you how clever I am, I warned you about a tornado on last Wednesday's comments and the tornado was today.

Still hope you are all right.

Kay Dennison said...

Doesn't look like my cuppa! I am so far out of it as far as new movies go. I really prefer the old classics which had grace, style and class.

Betty said...

jay: Different? I'll say. Good action, though.

docmtcat: It is, indeed, a funny word. But, you might enjoy the movie. It was just that one scene that was surprising.

hi, pj: No, you probably wouldn't enjoy this movie.

karen: I don't know. Maybe you'd like to check him out? lol

dirkstar: It's definitely a noun.

peggy: I can't believe it, either. It kind of sneaked up on me. lol

annie: Well, yes. I do like a lot of variety in my movies.

nancy: We are fine, here. But, Missouri really took a hit, as did other parts of Arkansas. Thanks.

kay: I like the old movies, too.

kenju said...

Ha! I haven't heard the word tallywhacker since my mom died.

I liked Viggo in Lord of the rings, but that photo up there leaves me cold. His hair looks so funny. I think, even with the prospect of seeing him nekkid, I'll pass on that movie....LOL

Anonymous said...

Were those 'subtitles' there to enable Americans to understand the language of us 'rainy old' Londoners ? ;-)

John ... http://oldgit.wordpress.com/

Lena said...

Hmmmm. I might score some points by suggesting this as a probable future film to watch with hubby!

He'll have no clue to where I got the idea from!

patsy said...

i saw several movies in the '80 with bruce willis all naked and they managed to show his penis in several shot along with the hair on every thing. sick.

Betty said...

kenju: There wasn't much to see, so you haven't missed anything.

john: They were speaking Russian. Do you hear a lot of Russian spoken in London?

lena: It was actually a pretty good movie.

patsy: Thank goodness I missed the Bruce Willis showings. lol

Anonymous said...

In London, Betty, it's a case of you name , they speak it, although Polish seems to be more common than Russian. Even my daughter, who is serving with London's Metropolitan Police speaks a bit of Polish these days.

John ... http://oldgit.wordpress.com/

Claude said...

Not my type of man at all. And not a film that I'd like to see. Thanks for the warning.

Newt said...

I liked the movie, but I am a fan of the dark and deadly. I love films that don't quite follow the hollywood formula. Pan's Labrynth was another movie that was very dark and deadly. And I think the Viggo love really stems from his Lord of the Ring Days. But then, I'm a sucker for the hard edged bad boy.