The GOP Final Four

Here's my take on the four GOP candidates who are still standing - at least until the Florida primary.

Let's start with Newt, shall we?  What a winner! While married to his first wife, New was a Lutheran. By the time he married wife #2, he was a Baptist. Now, with Calista, he is a Catholic. Doesn't this suggest that he doesn't have any true religious convictions?  His political career was a disaster.  He's the only Speaker of the House who has ever had to resign in disgrace because of his total lack of ethics. Calling him "Speaker Gingrich" is just plain disgusting and the media and his rivals should stop giving him that kind of respect.

Gingrich, more than anyone else, was the architect of the politics of personal destruction.  He crafted and distributed  a memo listing all the despicable adjectives that were to be used against the Democrats, and are still used today. He's pretty ineffective during the televised debates if, as happened last night, the moderator asks the audience not to respond.  It just took the wind right out of his overinflated sails.

Mitt Romney:  He doesn't get it.  It's not that he's wealthy. It's that he can't relate to people who aren't as fortunate. He doesn't understand or care that comments like, 'I'm unemployed, too," and "It's just jealousy" (on the part of the middle class), that just don't sit well.  It's not how much money you made in the last two years, Mitt, it's the unfairness of the tax code that protected you from having to pay your fair share.  And, it doesn't look too good that you have hidden so much money in the Cayman's.  He used to stash it in Swiss banks until Switzerland rightly agreed to divulge the names of the folks who were dodging all those taxes. The U.S. finally got wise, and realized how much the treasury was losing by not investigating those tax shelters. That's when Mitt moved his money to the Caymans.  Greedy, Mitt.  Just plain Greedy.

Rick Santorum: Or, as I like to refer to him, Senator Sanctimonious. He's just full of piety, but not very compassionate toward the poor and downtrodden.  He has more "Thou Shalt Nots" than the commandments.  Especially when it comes to women's uteruses and to gays. Then, he's all hellfire and brimstone.  He's so eaten up with it, someday he'll just dry up and blow away.  The sooner the better.

Ron Paul:  Comic relief.  They say even a blind hog finds a truffle every now and then. Ron Paul actually says somethings I can agree with, at times.  It's too bad he's crazy as a Betsy Bug the rest of the time.

Sometimes, the remaining four candidates make me long for Michele Bachmann and Rick Perry.  I mean it.
The next debate is Thursday on CNN.

It's too bad we don't have a full slate of Democrats running for President, too.  Then, you'd see that I can criticize, carp and make fun of them, too.  I'd make fun of President Obama's channeling of Al Green, but he actually sounded pretty good.  Rats! Who knew he could sing?

Stay tuned.