Wednesday, April 29, 2009

But, Seriously Folks

Welcome back to the Democratic Party, Sen. Specter. At least until the Republicans manage to get their act together and win another election. If they will let you back in.

See, we welcome anybody, even political opportunists. We've known you long enough to know that you probably won't vote the straight party line. You never have, which put you in hot water, sometimes, with that other party. But, we'll be understanding, unless you vote with them too many times.

We weren't too happy with you when you made such an ass of yourself being so nasty to Anita Hill. But, you got what you deserved - a new member of the Supreme Court who, to date, hasn't had an original thought or voted against Justice Scalia on anything. Trouble is, we got him, too, and we didn't deserve him.

Oh, well, let's let bygones be bygones. Let's be buddies. Let's be friends.

Let's watch our backs.

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Imagine you live in New York City. Imagine you lived there and lost friends or family in the twin towers. Imagine you looked up, the other day, at the sound of an airplane, and saw a big airliner being chased by F-16 fighter planes, and flying low. Would you be a bit uneasy? Would you panic?

Of course you would. Now, Imagine finding out that the plane was Air Force One and the F-16s were just participating in a little advertising exercise, taking pictures with the Statue of Liberty. Imagine some doofus in Washington D.C. saying, "Sorry 'bout that. My bad." Would you be furious?

Of course, you would. Me, too.

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Governor "Good Hair" Perry wants Texas to secede. How about that? He seems to think this threat will strike fear into the hearts of Americans everywhere. Not this American. I happen to think that if Texas seceded, it would solve a lot of problems for this country.

Now, don't get all bent out of shape. We would give anyone currently in Texas the option of moving back into the U.S. for, say the first six months without having to climb the wall we'd build along the borders. I have a few good friends who live in Texas. I would hate to think that they'd become part of Mexico with the stroke of a pen. Or, worse yet, what if Mexico refused to annex them? Well, that would be their problem

I've been to Texas many times. I've seen the Alamo and the grassy knoll and had the best Mushroom-Swiss hamburger in the world at Dick's Last Resort. I've also had the worst allergy attack of my life there. And the worst case of the flu. And suffered in the extreme heat, which seems to be almost year-round.

I can't think of much that I'd miss if Texas became Texico.

Stay tuned.

9 comments:

Kell said...

Yeah, he also wanted to reject the stimulus money, but the senate voted to take it. Let's secede! But first, let's take government economic help. Of course he says he doesn't want to, but he will for the good of the state, or something like that.

gawilli said...

Watch our backs is right. I'm with you on that one and Texas, too.

Ima Wizer said...

Watch out! Even if some of us don't like Perry or Rethuglicans, don't lump us all together and realize that we are as proud of being Texans as you are of your state.

Arkansas Patti said...

Love Jon Stewarts take on the Airforce on photo op over New York, "Hasn't anyone ever heard of Photoshop."

Tincanman said...

Poor Arlen. So afraid of losing the upcoming election he decided (again)to abandon his principals (does he have any?)and re-join the Dems. Now, shame on all of us for seeing his move for what it is: Naked Political Self-Preservation. After all, didn't President Obama tell us all it is time to "look forward, not back." Shame on us. Welcome, Arlen, we forgive you (NOT) for all the less-than-intelligent stances you've taken in the past and will surely repeat in the future. Go have a seat to the right of our Blue Dogs, ok?

Darlene said...

At least Arlen Specter was honest about the reason he jumped ship, which is a novelty for a politician.

Maybe the Texan voter learned his/her lesson and won't put another Bush or Parry in office. One can only hope.

Richard said...

The really hilarious thing about Spector's defection is that it puts Al Franken as our potential 60th Dem Senator. I made mention of the irony today as well at the hood.

As for Texas: It takes forever to drive through it, a lot of it is ugly as hell on the interstate, and the people brag that they don't pay state income tax.

Wouldn't miss em, but it ain't gonna happen.

Rich

Lisa said...

Betty, I'm totally with you on our newest "Democratic" Senator, but you can't sentence me to secede with Gov. Bighair, I mean, Goodhair. You just can't!

Pat - Arkansas said...

Hello! I'm arrived here courtesy of a link at Arkansas Patti's blog. You have an interesting place here. :) I've enjoyed reading some of your back posts, and will be back. Always happy to find another Arkansan.